Today I woke with a headache, not something with which I am regularly afflicted. Two cups of tea later I was awake enough to realize I felt sad. First of all, you should know it took me years to be able to identify my feelings properly so even in my realization I was slightly cheered. Yesterday we should have closed on our house. Instead we met with the realtor to sign an addendum allowing us to stay through the end of the month. Pretty much a bummer.
Maybe a good sign of my stress came last night at supper when I looked down at myself and realized my shirt was on inside out. Yep, I wore it that way all day; meeting the realtor and also food shopping. I suspect I was maybe three the last time I wore my shirt inside out in public! I live with three men; of course, none of them noticed! So there you go. Have a good chuckle at my expense.
While you are chuckling I'd like to throw a couple more family anecdotes at you because there has not been nearly enough laughter lately. I've been trying to figure out how to work these into a blog of their own but I can't. My eldest son has a serious aversion to hygiene. Really. When we ask him to take a shower he freaks out and asks, "What did I do wrong?!" Like a shower is a disciplinary action! His lack of hygiene frequently contributes to an ongoing discussion of the reprehensible state of filth under his fingernails. Even when he washes his hands his nails remain black. A week or so ago we punished him by having him take a shower and scrape out his nails. I know, we are so unreasonable. Someone call CPS immediately. I conducted a post shower inspection and made a ridiculous hoopla about how clean he was and how lovely he smelled, which is a whole other issue with a pre-pubescent male. Not six hours after said hoopla I happened to notice his nails were black again. I truly do not know what that boy does with his hands and I suspect I do not want to. When I casually mentioned the fingernails and my consternation at how quickly their cleanly state disintegrated, #1 wailed at me, informing me that "My fingernails are Immune to Clean!" How does a parent keep a straight face at that? Answer? You can't.
I filed that comment away as blogworthy, along with another, slightly older comment from the same child. I may have mentioned that boys of most ages are just plain gross: they smell, they make noises at highly inappropriate moments (and take great pleasure in it!), they communicate with punching and wrestling, they are loud and wild. Yes, I lump my husband in this category as well. Truthfully, I would not trade in the "maleness" for anything resembling a little girl so really I don't mind; I just like to tell a good story! Along with all the gross behaviors is nose picking, which is one thing. Eating the pickings is entirely different. After years of telling my boys to STOP IT, I accused #1 recently when he was just chewing on a fingernail. Like that's any better! His very indignant comment, and it makes me laugh even as I type, was, "Mama! I'm on a diet from eating boogers!"
Pure proof at the nastiness of boys!